its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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