i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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