Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize
