Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Found the puke drawer
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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