So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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