she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
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