I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
