Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize