So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
I seem to have left my pride at pride
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
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