I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Randomize
