Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Randomize
