My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize