He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
