that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
