Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
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