Hey man sorry I got all grabby
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
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