i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
