How'd it feel making her break her religion?
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Randomize
