I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Naked. naked and bneed help.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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