Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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