i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize