But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
