Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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