Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Randomize
