is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
