So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Randomize
