I can't watch pbs sober anymore
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
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