i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
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