this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
