Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
