i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
My ATM looks so different sober.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
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