Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Randomize
