Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
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