Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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