this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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