I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize