he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Randomize
