Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
We had to coat check the pizza.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Randomize
