it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
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