Heybabeimwearingurpanties
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
You can't just leave with hair like that
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
