No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
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