We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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