Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
