i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
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