normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
Randomize
