my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
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