its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
