in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
