i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize