we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
