I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
